Shorts

It's amazing the significance some items take on. As though they are an entity in themselves. A t-shirt, old bandana, a broken knick-knack. Simple, ordinary things that have a profound story behind them. Shayla has any number of little, seemingly meaningless items that have a whole history behind them. And today she acquired another.

Thanks to Master's encouragement and a good deal of effort, shayla has been slimming down in a way that is pleasantly shocking to her. There are any number of positive side effects that come with it, not the least of which is the reduction in her wardrobe. With a rare exception or two, none of the clothing shayla came with when she arrived here fit any longer. So she is now in the process of re-building her wardrobe. Oh, it's nice, worth every tear and drop of sweat. However, she's still shaping up. What is fitting her now, in 3 months, likely will be too big on her.

And today it was a pair of jogging shorts. Nothing fancy, simply an ordinary pair of shorts. Only they're size small. A bit on the tight side, as shayla's still improving her figure. Her butt, as well as the rest of her, actually looks good in them. Smalls, amazing. She's forgotten what it's like to be in sizes like that. And more evidence of her changes is apparent all the time. The bone structure in her face and neck, shoulders, her belly. As time goes on shayla recognizes the person in the mirror less and less. The calves that have somehow come to be part of her legs. And yet it's always still herself that looks back.

Have you ever watched a slow transformation through all it's steps? You'll look at something intently, hardly noticing the changes taking place, and from one instant to the next there it is, a great change from what the subject was to what it is now. It's as if she's finding herself all over again, only a much improved herself. As though she is not only going back to what she actually is, but improving what was there. The wonder of it all, to shayla, is that it's always been there within her. It only needed the right environment, a hothouse, so to speak, to allow the changes to take place without interference.

And the great part is, there's still more to come. Beautiful.

shayla

Workplace

Shayla, as many other kajirae, is employed. Her job is good, many of her co-workers are also friends. The people there have little idea of the nature of shayla's relationship with her Master. If the subject is ever brought up, shayla simply says that 'he and i have a very old-fashioned relationship', and leaves it at that. Most of the time the person assumes she is talking about the interpretation of a marriage as it would have been, say, 60 years ago. Close, but still very far off-track.

Once, months ago, shayla came across an entry on a discussion board about a man's slave who had been speaking with his co-workers, and naively informed them that she was his slave. Apparently not much detail was offered, and the co-workers were left with their imaginations feeding off the sereotype society assumes when the hear they term 'slave'. Needless to say, the Master was not employed there much longer. A politically correct official reason was given, but it was clear to all involved precisely why it had taken place. To shayla's mind, this demonstrated idiocy of the most blatant kind. While it is clear to the knowing eye what shayla is even in public, for her to make it obvious in such a manner is asking for trouble. Such introductions need tact and the correct circumstances, not chatting over coffee with people you've just met.

The people shayla work with are good, honest, hard-working people, and a number of them are devout Christians. For her to make her true situation clear would cause a great deal of upset, uproar, and perhaps even an attempt on their part to 'save' shayla from her Master. So she is simply herself, and steers from the subject of her relationship to her 'husband', as many assume her Master to be. She hands them only enough information as necessary, and leaves their imaginations to fill the gaps that will answer questions and still leave them comfortable.

There is one man she works with, though, who has strongly suspected all along what shayla really is to her Master, and only a week ago confirmed his suspicions to her. Carl is a good man, 10 years younger than shayla, and one of the only people she works with who is at least as intelligent as she is. Though she can sense that Carl is not Master material, merely very perceptive. To him, it has always been clear what shayla actually is, though it has only been the past few weeks that any remote doubt in his mind had been removed. When he let shayla know he'd been aware, she was actually surprised, as he'd never given any indication that he had any idea. We talked about it for a while off and on as we worked. Carl's heard of similar alternate lifestyles before, and to him, that is all shayla's condition is, merely a different way of living from the normal. Shayla let him know that she's never thrived as well as she has since she's been here. He stated that he knew, and had noted the changes in her since she'd begun working with him. When asked if he was uncomfortable with the notion or working with shayla the answer was a definite no. He's always been comfortable with her, always known that she would do a good job and her best in whatever task was set for her. No, he wasn't going to blab to every listening ear shayla's personal life. To him, shayla's slavery has always been obvious. What surprised shayla was that he was perceptive enough to put together the various clues. Most people never seem to get that far.

And since then, shayla's not noted any change at all in her work environment. The same silly, fun people she's always worked with, who have no idea (or very little) of shayla's true condition. There have even been a few times that shayla has gone in on her off-hours, collar locked in place (though the padlock was turned so that it is to the side, hidden by her hair). Nobody's said a word, though a question or two about where shayla'd gotten her 'choker'. But no real questioning, no wondering. So while she is still every bit herself, flirtatiousness, devotion to service and all, she keeps tactful about her true nature and position.

There is no reason to let it be known what she actually is. Any questions can be answered with just enough of the truth to be honest, but no more information given than is needed. And there are times that it actually is fun to shayla, when her co-workers speculate what it is that her 'husband' does to cause her to be so happy, motivate her to lose weight and get into shape. Sometimes even going so far as to state that they wished their husbands would do the same to them as shayla's. And so often shayla sees her co-workers converse (even her supervisor) about strife in their relationships. While shayla empathizes and feels sympathy for them, she has to smile a little, as she knows she will never have to worry about that sort of thing in her 'old-fashioned' relationship to 'her man'.

shayla

Sense

We all have feelings we can't describe in some situations. A feeling as though something is right or not right. Often it's called a 'sixth sense.' Shayla has never looked into the theory very much, she simply goes by her own experience. There have been a number of times that shayla has been in a situation and felt that it was good. Circumstances would develop from that situation that would always end in an improvement somehow, if not for shayla, then for someone she cared for. The same goes for situations that felt bad. Shayla, any time she began to get an idea that she was around a person or situation that was not positive, would depart the circumstances as soon as possible. Inevitably something would take place that could have been damaging to shayla on some level. And while shayla is at least as intelligent as the next person, she often uses how and what she feels in a situation as much as the cold facts to determine her reaction.

Often shayla will feel something between herself and her Master. It has happened since our first conversation. In the beginning, she did her best to ignore it. Such a profound relationship as what she was entering in needs to be extremely cautiouly entered into, with the girl using every resource she can find to be fully informed about a man before she becomes his. To do otherwise, just because it 'felt right', is utter blindness that can lead to disaster. So for the longest time she simply set that part of herself aside and concentrated only on the concrete facts.

As time goes on and she becomes more settled and 'at home' in her surroundings, she has been becoming more sensitive to her Master. His moods, feelings, and so forth. While this has taken place she has come to feel a tie or bond between us. Perhaps there is an essay on that very subject out there, written by some wiser, more experienced kajira than shayla is. She doesn't know, she's never come across one. (One what? Essay or more experienced kajira? :-) Marcus) But for her, this 'link' seems to be very real. Shayla is certain that a great deal of it is due to how similar Master and her are in some things. We are both quiet, sensitive people. Neither of us can bear to see anything suffering. Both of us enjoy doing things for the people that are important to us. But it seems to go beyond that.

"There is a specific magic, so to speak, and chemistry, between each Master and each slave" (Savages of Gor, pg 199).

How one Man relates to one girl will not be how he relates to another. The same is true for slaves. Shayla can attest to that herself. Often she has been close to other Masters. Yet never has any of them brought out what her Owner does, to cause her to feel towards them as she does towards him. None of them have come close to handling and managing her so well.

As shayla recalls incidents that have taken place the past few months, she can point out a number of times the chemistry between her Master and herself has been palpable. There have been a few men that have come close to brushing against what shayla is in her depths. But none have come near as close to hitting the mark so dead-on as her Master. And as time goes by, his hold on her soul becomes greater.

Shayla often feels that she was put on this earth specifically to be his.

shayla

Loves

It seems every blog has, at some point, a list of favorite things. The lists range from dogs to desserts to men. But shayla's will be a bit different from all that.

So, we have the 10 things, in no particular order, that shayla most loves about her slavery.

1. The way she feels when he smiles at her and lets her know he is pleased with her. It is a feeling akin to ecstacy, only it's all mental. It makes shayla feel that she is ready to walk through coals for him.

2. When he takes hold of her hair and pulls her head to his side or leg, pressing it there as he strokes her head. It's very soothing and reassuring to shayla.

3. The way each time she follows an instinctive reaction that rises from deep within her, it seems to be the right one.

4. That she can simply be, with no reservations, whether good or bad. And that he will support her in that to help her improve it, and she never has, nor will she, worry about his possible ridicule for what is less than ideal or pleasing to him.

5. The look that comes into his eyes at times. A look in which there is little gentleness, only a fierce possessiveness and demand. It is a look that frightens her, mesmerizes her, and arouses her. And when he looks at her in that way she could not look away even if she wanted to, because there is so much of his ownership in it.

6. Laying at his feet while he is on the computer. Some of our most enjoyable times happen when shayla is there, licking and kissing them while we speak. Master has mentioned shayla prostrating herself when she is being scolded. And she does so simply because she is comfortable, and knows that he enjoys her being there

7. Any of the times that he tells shayla that she makes him laugh.

8. Knowing that he is strong enough to punish her if she is not pleasing. One of the best things about shayla's slavery is that she knows that she cannot get away with games or less than her best with him. He is strong enough to know what he expects from her, and wise enough to motivate her to *want* to do what it is he's wanting of her.

9. The feel of his collar around her throat, the sound of the padlock when she puts it on. There have been more than one occasion that shayla has forgotten about removing it when she leaves the house, only to need to take it of when, say, we are parked at the grocery store. It is a continual reminder to her, even when he's not around, of his ownership of her. That he decided he wanted her enough to grant it to her.

10. The peace she feels when she enters his home after being gone. Simply because of the dynamic between us, there is no struggle for authority, no disagreements over how things should be done, no arguing because one of the pair did not get their way. His being Master removes all need for such things. And while he does not do things the way shayla would, he does them quite well. She never feels any reason or desire to nag about anything. Simply by virtue of the fact that he's 'driving', removes all need for any type of trying to improve things.

She has got a great deal to be happy about in her servitude to this man.

shayla

Unleashed

Master has been training shayla intensely the past few months. In that time, for various reasons, she has not been out much. With the rare exception, Master has not had much opprotunity to introduce shayla to his friends or to take her out. She has spent her time caring for his place, working, training, all within a 4-mile radius of their home. It has given her time to adapt to and settle into her still-new life under her Master's hand.

Master and Kae have been friends for a number of years, and she knows and, to some extent, understands the nature of our relationship. So when Master needed to help someone with a move, shayla was packed up and taken to Kae's for a few days. It's about an hour and a half away from their home, outside one of the towns that are nearby Houston. Kae's the original country girl. She actually lives across the street from the house she grew up in. A wonderful lady, though, who seems to have the ability to meld into whatever environment she happens to be in and look and feel right at home. We enjoy each other's company and conversation.

A break from the routine, the usual scenery, in an enjoyable place with enjoyable people shayla feels comfortable with. But something strange, still. Even though being away from her normal routine and into a different environment was a welcome change, she was not fully comfortable. Shayla felt off, disjointed, as if she was in something that she was no longer suited for. Her Master in a conversation actually used the term 'lost'.

There have been times that Master has taken shayla out. And during those times she was, as with the visit with Kae, expected to behave as what she was, kajira. Respectful, deferential, conscientious of the respect to the Free she is expected to display. But this was different, because her Master was not there. Nor would he be there until 3 days later. So shayla was no longer out of her Master's home and no longer in his reach. Essentially, she was alone and out of the hot-house in which she'd been nurtured.

For she is no longer suited to this life. And while she enjoys being around people, friends, even strangers when she goes to places, she is other than those around her. Better than? less than? Not at all, but even when she is not in her Master's presence and under his hand, she is still a kajira. And that fact causes a subtle divergence when she's with others. So as she was at Kae's, she was in, to her, an unfamiliar situation. One in which she needed to be aware of what she was and still be 'one of the family.' One person being two things at the same time, almost. But it was a learning experience. Shayla was able to manage both somehow. Able to meld herself into the situation and be both buddy and one who served.

Overall, it was a very enjoyable few days. And shayla got something she always looks for in any situation, she learned something.

shayla