Looking

So Master's looking for a place for us to move in the next couple months. He's got a few ideas in mind, has asked shayla her opinion on some. This is not to be misunderstood as he's allowing shayla to have influence on the outcome, merely that he's interested in her opinion.

One place that Master's had in mind for some time is in downtown Houston. It's an old building, built in 1910, if shayla's faulty memory serves correctly. Master had done some work for the owner, and had arranged a meeting the other day to discuss a few things he was considering. The owner's office is located in the same building. They talked while shayla kept quiet, listened, and digested what was being discussed. Afterwards Master asked for the key to the unit he'd noted months ago.

Naturally, the unit is on the 3rd floor. Walking through the building itself is interesting, with the turns of the halls & the old (but still operable) freight elevator in the middle. The unit is an 'open plan', the kitchen off to one side, separated by the unit by a thick, heavy door. Complete with a frame of latches on the outside. Though one can open the door from inside the kitchen. Bathroom next to the kitchen. The walls are bare brick, with one or two finished walls. A large room is to one side of the entrance. Apart from that, just wide-open space, complete with a ceiling that shayla won't attempt to guess as to how high is.

Some people would be drooling over this type of place, imagining all sorts of things they could do with such a blank canvas to work with. Being a small-town girl, who's never seen anything like it, shayla can't imagine what she'd do with such an area, or even how to begin. She's certain there's an infinite amount of things that could be done with it, but isn't able to come up with a one. But she knows that it'd be gorgeous when handled right.

After we explored and discussed possibilities, Master took shayla back down, turned in the key, and had another short chat with his friend before leaving. During the drive back home we talked about possible future plans, what Master wished for them and what shayla would like. It seems that some of our more significant conversations just seem to develop out of an idle question or two. It's one of the things that shayla always enjoys.

Master allowed shayla to express her preference for lunch, then made his own decision on what would be done. As is often the case when Master takes shayla to a meal, conversation slowed to a crawl while Master browsed through the newspaper. A number of kajirae would possibly find it boring, a slave sitting in a restaurant with her Owner while he browsed through the paper, but that's never been the case for shayla. For her, the quiet is a very comfortable, secure quiet, and she doesn't feel much need to fill the silence with talk just for the sake of talking.

A couple more errands were dealt with before Master parked at home. The remainder of the afternoon was simple. Master doing some work and reading on the computer, shayla taking care of her duties before he went to his job. Normally shayla would have stayed up for him, but with an early morning the next day, was asleep long before he returned from his job.

Days like this are something shayla loves.

shayla

Cadaverobedienz

[Explanatory note: Shayla left something out. The term "cadaverobedienz" is a German word used by the Wehrmacht. Not sure when the word came into play, but it surely came from earlier Prussian military tradition. It literally translates as "to obey as would a cadaver." It is more accurate to say like a zombie - that is unquestioningly, without thought for personal consequences. It's a useful mindset to instill into troops that are going to have to jump out of a trench and assault into massed machine guns. A helpful mindset for kajirae, also. :-) - MLD]

Marcus: Right before you bailed on me last night after the cadaverobedienz thread, I was about to explain something to you. About my goal for you.

Marcus: I will be satisfied with your subjugation to me when you become as one with me as the fingers of my hand. When I will them to do something, they don't ask why, they don't wonder how they will like it they just do it. Even if it's grasping the shovel again when they'e sore and blistered, or grabbing something from the fire, or smacking a kajira on the ass.

Turns out those are words to live by. When shayla first joined her Master here, she was uncertain about everything. So much of all this was so new to her, simply because she'd never experienced anything like it before. And being as curious and sassy as she'd been most of her life, made for some (ok, numerous) errors in her obedience.

She had to learn how to obey her Master. How to just get in & do what he wished of her instead of stopping and asking questions, or trying to find the reasoning behind what he's wishing her to do. Much of this goes back to the trust issue. For the longest time shayla has not been able to really trust in someone to the extent that she's learned to trust in her Master. As time goes on and she learns more of her Master and herself, she is able to obey more promptly and more thoroughly. She's learning how to stop her questions and just do as he wishes. And it seems as though the longer she is here, the easier it is to stop those hesitations in obedience and just do as he wishes.

Mindless obedience? Perhaps, to a point. But with it is an equal amount of faith that while shayla doesn't know what he's got in mind, he does. Knowing that she's never come to harm under his direction helps tremendously as well. As she types this, shayla wonders if a certain level of trust is required for cadaverobedienz like what Master was speaking of to take place. In this world, it makes a certain amount of sense. But the ideal is for a kajira to be just that obedient. It's something she'll have to look into.

shayla

Security

Marcus: You're needing to sleep.

shayla: enjoy talking to you, sleep better at night for some reason

Marcus: You'll sleep even better at my feet, safe and secure in your collar.

shayla: i'm sure i will & i'm not joking when i say that, either, i'm serous

shayla: serious even

Marcus: me neither.

Marcus: Who wouldn't sleep better with a Gov't Trained Killer in the room?

This conversation took place months ago, but it's always struck shayla as important. From the time that she began to seriously consider the notion that she would belong to him, there has been a sense of peace in herself that shayla has rarely experienced.

Shayla has always been the one to take care of herself. And while she's always done the best she could, there has been a subtle desire to be able to rely on someone to some degree. She never realized, though, how thoroughly that would happen.

He's been in charge long before shayla came to him. From getting her started in eating and exercising to seeing to it she got the help she needed when she needed it. It's something she is still adapting to, this being able to rely upon someone. She is expected to be proactive in what she is doing, whether that be bills, her job, exercise, whatever. But any time she is in doubt, could use some advice or direction, she is able, no, encouraged, to come to him with her questions. And she always keeps in mind to try to do things as he'd wish her to do.

There is also the security that seems to go hand-in-hand with being someone's property. Shayla belongs to him, and so long as she continues to be obedient and pleasing she has little to worry about over-all. Simply having him in the house gives her a sense of security she's never felt before. Almost as if she knows there's nothing he'd not be able to deal with and come out for the best.

As for sleeping at his feet, she would say that she's never felt such security as when she curls around them. Or any other time she is at his feet. A sense that this is where she belongs, where she's always supposed to be.

shayla

Felines

Shayla's not the only pet Master's got. He's also got a tabby cat, 3 years old. She didn't think much of shayla at first, but, like all cats, adapted to the new addition to the house with relative ease.

And for the past month or so has been in heat. Shayla's not been around un-fixed female cats for a while but a month? Isn't that a bit much? Apparently not for her. She'll spend hours in the bedroom windowsill, yowling and calling for hours at a time. It's loud enough it's even come to start getting on shayla's nerves. Saturday night when shayla came home, though, it was too silent in the house, and no sign of the cat. Shayla is very careful of other people's property to begin with, and more so with her Master's things. So after changing clothes shayla went cat-hunting. Went through all the rooms, checked behind doors, called her, looked in closets, nothing. Not a sign of MamaCat anywhere. By now shayla was certain that the cat'd slipped out at some time. And the cat's howling was conspicuously absent that night. When Master got home shayla let him know that his cat had flown the coop. Master wasn't worried much, and neither was shayla.

The next day we went about our business, ran errands and so forth. The whole time both of us kept an eye out for the cat. No sign, though. No sign of the cat. By now Master'd written her off as lost. Finally in the evening while shayla was getting dinner ready she heard a strange scratching at the coat closet door. Upon opening the door out pops a very po'd, very hungry and thristy MamaCat. When Master had gotten his jacket out of the closet the night before the cat decided to take the opprotunity to go exploring, only to get shut in for a day. The whole time she'd not made a sound.

But she was alright, merely hungry and Not Pleased. Shortly after she filled her empty belly she resumed her place on the bedroom windowsill and begun the howling and calling to potential mates. A whole day shut in a closet and not a sound, only to sit in the window and howl less than 10 minutes after being let out. The next morning she did pause in her singing to sidle up to Master, settle on his chest, and express her displeasure towards him for shutting her up in that windowless, foodless room in true cat fashion by marking him as her territory. Shayla's certain you can understand what's involved when a cat marks their territory. Ugh.

shayla

Window Shopping

Master had an unexpected plan the other day. Shayla had no idea of it until Maste told her to get ready 'we're going somewhere' So she got herself together and we were out the door. As is typical, Master didn't tell her what his plan was. She simply kept quiet and enjoyed the ride with her Master. For her, that would have been enough.

It wasn't long before Master pulled into a movie theater. He and shayla had both been curious about the movie, 'Robot', and Master decided to appease his curiosity. Admittedly, it felt a little odd, going to watch a movie with him. Master normally gets his fill of crowds & so forth at his work, and avoids them unless he as to. But, this was an early afternoon showing, so there were few people there anyhow. The movie was better than expected, though how Master made himself comfortable wasn't quite what shayla would have expected. Leaned back, towards shayla, his hand slipped between her thighs and resting near her crotch. Very comfortable. Shayla could have sat there all day like that, even after the movie.

When it was over, we got back on the freeway headed away from home. Master had an idea or two. We talked about the movie while we headed towards the downtown area, stopping in front of an old 3-storey building. Master and shayla got out, went in, and up to the 3rd storey. Turns out that this was the building in which Master had originally wished to live when shaya joined him. An old building, with ceilings perhaps 13 feet high, and a great amount of space in the units. As it was, they were all locked, and Master was unable to contact anyone to let us in so that Master could show shayla what he'd spoken about to her months ago. For shayla, this is one of the more interesting things about having joined her Master. Seeing places he's spoken of and spent time in, meeting the people that have been so important to him that he's talked about before shayla came to him. So we piled into the truck and headed home.

On the way Master pulled into a furniture store that shayla has been wanting to snoop in since she arrived. We'll be moving in 2- 3 months and Master is toying with the idea of acquiring some new furniture for the new place. As it happened, we went to the bedroom sets first. A little bit of browsing and, predictably enough, a salesman comes to offer his assistance. Shayla kept quiet, paid attention, and gave her opinions as they were requested while Master and the salesman, Jim, if memory serves correctly, exchanged the usual man-to-man small talk. Men are such interesting creatures to observe during these little exchanges. Jim, being used to the woman of a pair having more say in things, would regularly ask shayla for her opinion, preferences, and so forth. Each time she deferred to her Master poor Jim got a puzzled look on his face.

It got even more interesting when we migrated from the bedroom sets to the mattresses (a logical choice). By then Jim'd learned not to ask shayla her opinion. But what struck shayla as being funny was when Master was trying one of the mattresses. Neither one of us gave the exchange much thought until after it was over. He was laying on a mattress, looked at shayla, snapped his fingers and pointed to the space next to him. Often, when Master and shayla are at home, he will summon her to him from another area of the room in that way, pointing to where he wishes her to be. So she didn't give it a second thought, simply obeyed without thinking. It wasn't until she'd lain down as he'd instructed that she realized how such an exchange would appear to someone who is not in a lifestyle such as this. A glance at Jim confirmed her suspicions. A look of surprise and puzzlement on his face before he suppressed it.

A few moments later it was even cuter to shayla. Jim had asked something about what shayla would prefer. She didn't say a word, simply listened while her Master told Jim, 'she ain't got no say in what's picked' (Her memory sucks. I actually said, "It ain't up to her." - MLD)(Master's all Texan, don't let the grammar fool you for an instant). Jim perhaps only then got a real glimmer of how Master's and shayla's relationship worked. Of course, shayla's collar, which Master'd had her wear that day, would have made such a fact more easily figured out. It seemed that Jim understood enough of how our relationship worked to stop asking shayla's preferences. Not that shayla minded being asked, but simply that she would not have any say in the final decision. Allowed to give an opinion on what she thought would work, but not to influence the final outcome.

The remainder of the time spent in the store we browsed through what they had. Singling out various chairs, dressers and armoires. Shayla spent almost as much time looking at furniture as she did paying attention to what caught her Master's eye. The man's got good taste.

shayla