'Complete Submission'

Much of what's agonized over and discussed until the subject wears thin on various discussion boards is complete submission. That a kajira submit everything, totally, without qualification, to her Master. Which is exactly what a girl should do. It's as important to the relationship as the slave's complete transparency to her Master, disclosing everything and anything to him. It is something that shayla strives for daily, complete and total submission to her Master and his wishes.

Only there's a slight flaw in the thinking. Shayla has been surrendering all to her Master, submitting completely to him, from the day she first came to his home. Doing everything she could to yield fully to his wishes. But at the same time she has been surrendering, she has also been changing. She learns, re-discovers things, understands things on levels she's not reaced before. She's been growing in her service. And Master's been bringing her along at a careful pace. Letting her have time to incorporate into her behavior what he's instructed her before adding something else. And as mentioned in a previous posting, her progress is uneven, which is to be expected. Though she is always progressing towards her goal.

So, is she still surrendering everything she can to her Master? Oh, yes, by all means. But, comparing the level of surrender to the one she belongs to now, to what she was able to surrender fullly when she first arrived, the contrast is blatantly undeniable. She is no longer the person she was when she walked into this door. She has grown, in her service, her self-image, and personality. And her surrender has deepened and grown along with her. What, less than 3 months ago, was complete surrender, now would only be a cop-out, a severe laxity in care and commitment that would bring what she most dreads, her Master's displeasure and disappointment.

Will she ever achieve 'complete, 100% surrender'? The deepest, fullest surrender she's capable of? No. Because she'll be constantly changing, growing, learning. There will always be some way in which she can surrender to her Master more deeply. It is only a matter of seeking it out.

shayla