Feminity

Shayla's upbringing was very unusual. There was no female influence, no example for shayla to follow. She grew up with only male examples and male role models. As a result, she developed almost asexually, too female to be a tom-boy, too male to be a girly girl. Despite such development, the desire to be feminine; to be beautiful, graceful, sexy, was there. Only she didn't have a clue how to go about it, how to acquire the information. No examples that she could have emulated.

So when she came to her Master, shayla had the heart, the drive, the desire to be a good kajira. With no idea about anything feminine, not even how to walk as a woman. Master's mentioned more than once that shayla walked 'like a truck driver' when she first arrived. She's had to learn little by little. Makeup, clothing, how to walk, speak, move more gracefully. Dancing has been a project in and of itself. One she's still working on.

This past year has been full of any number of developments. There was the experience with shayla's makeup. She'd been applying it as best she knew how, knowing it was incorrect but having no idea about what would be the appropriate colors or technique (not that she knew any techniques). Master had shayla go out and replace everything she had one day. The day after she did the best that she knew with it. Master'd been gone over-night, and she was expecting him at 10 that morning. She was in the kitchen when Master came home, and she was so scared about his possible reaction her hands were trembling. Shayla knew what type of woman Master was used to, knew that she didn't come close to it. When Master questioned her she was almost in tears while she tried to explain. He brought shayla into the living room and she knelt at his feet while he asked what she was so scared about.

Her walking was something else that she needed help with. Master sent her to get the highest pair of heels she could find, and ordered her to wear them whenever she was in the house. Yes, it sounds crazy, but it worked. Shayla wore those shoes on a daily basis for over a month. It worked, too. Though shayla still will lapse back into a little of the swagger that she used to have, those times are very rare anymore.

The process of all this has been almost as fun as the results. And the more feminine she becomes, the more shayla finds of what she'd had hidden all this time.

shayla